me vs. therapy

'all i said was "you sound angry, but i really like the tone in your voice right now. it's kinda turnin' me on".'

'and then?'

'i heard a click.'

'really?'

'well, no. i'm lying. the phone didn't really click because it's a cell phone and what cell phones actually make a click when you hang them up? it was more like in the movies when the girl is in a home all alone at night and the creepy killer caller says he's going to kill her and then you hear like....a dead silence. that's more or less what it sounded like.'

'your clarification, however unnecessary, was well done.'

'thanks. so, that means she's not happy with me huh?'

'hmm, well usually angela, when someone hangs up on me...i figure they might not want to talk to me. for awhile.'

'yeah. but, you see i was lightening the tension with humor.'

'yeah. but, you see not everyone needs the tension lightened.'

'oh...i get it. sort of.'

'maybe you should try and be more compassionate when it comes to others feelings.'

Blank stare.

Look over at Satan. Satan blank stares back.

Look back at therapist, say; 'i'm compas....'

'no.'

'but, yes i ....'

'you're not at all.'

'bu...'

'stop. you're not.'

'you can't keep cutting me o...'

'yes i can.'

'i'm paying!'

'oh no angela....i'm paying. believe me.'

'well, that's just crap. i do nice stuff for people.'

'yes, you do. as long as you're going to get something out of it....like ice cream, attention, sex, a martini, satisfaction, an ego boost....'

'are you done?'

'not really no. but i guess the list could be endless, so i'll just stop there.'

'did one of my exs write you a letter or something?'

'angela. what you have to realize is this. not everyone takes most situations as lightheartedly as you do. especially when it comes to their feelings and heart and soul.'

Look over at Satan. Satan looks confused.

Look back at therapist, say; 'whatever. you might be right.'

'yes. i might be. next time, instead of chiming in with a funny quipe, listen instead.'

'that's not fun.'

'is being single fun?'

'yes.'

'you're just saying that to contradict me.'

'yes.'

'stop doing it.'

'yes.'

'angela.'

'yes.'

'don't say yes anymore.'

'ok.'

'don't start saying ok to everything either.'

'i hate that you know me.'

'sometimes i do too.'