me vs. therapy

'and to escape my crap ass of a day i put on my jammi bottoms and snap, crackle and pop t-shirt.'

 'the one that you climbed the balcony for?'

 'the very same.'

 'you must really like that shirt.'

 'well, it was a gift.'

 'gifts are nice.'

 'and it's wonderful and soft. like 600+ egyptian cotton sheet soft but without the price.'

'because it's been around awhile?'

'10 years.'

 'you can't beat that.'

 'no you really can't. you know what else you can't beat?'

 'i bet it's not a dead horse.'

 'you can't beat sitting your fat ass in a lazy boy and playing a video game all night.'

 'this doesn't sound exciting, but seeing as how your face lit up when you mentioned it i assume i have to ask about it.'

 'yes. thank you. so the game is a free roaming kind of thing. kinda set in the middle ages.'

Hear heavy sigh, look over at Satan.

Satan rolls eyes, noisely grabs readers digest off table and leaves.

 Look back at therapist. Therapist looks bored, says;  'uh-huh.'

 'and you can be a ogre or an elf or a human...you get the gist.'

 'not really but you're paying so keep going.'

 'so you get a horse if you want and swords and stuff and basically go and do whatever you want in cities and forests and mountains.'

 'fascinating.'

 'really?'

 'no.'

 Scowl.

 Therapist smiles.

 Say; 'anyway...so i'm riding my horse on a mountainside road and thinking about going into a cave and fighting monsters.....what are you writing?'

 'my obituary.'

 'oh. so i stop and think...no, the view from my horse is too cool, i'm just going to ride him around and relax and watch the trees and listen to the birds.'

 'uh-huh'

'and that's when it hit me.'

 'the wave of regret for wasting time on video games when you could be voluteering, gardening, reading or doing something else productive?'

 'no...what hit me was....wow, i'm really happy right now.'

 'and why do you think you were happy?'

 'because i wasn't in rhode island.'

 'but you were.'

 'but i wasn't. and i wasn't at work.'

 'you were an elf on a horse in a middle ages-like time.'

 'right. and i could do whatever i wanted.'

 'like kill monsters?'

 'yeah. and steal stuff from people's homes then sell it. and fight in the colleseum and make my horse run or make my horse walk or make my horse run or make my horse walk  or make my horse run or......'

'ok, ok...i get it.'

 Hear door open, look over.

 Satan walks in, trailing toilet paper on foot.

 Tosses digest on table, falls into chair, naps.

 Look over at therapist.

 Say; 'do you think that's bad?'

 'i don't think bad is the right term. let me ask you this...you said you were really happy, do you mean fullfilled happy?'

 'yes.'

 'uh-huh.'

 'was that the wrong answer?'

 'i don't think wrong is the right term.'

 'because it's wrong.'

 'right.'

 'what?'

 'nevermind.'

 'ok.'

 'so, angela. maybe it would be in your best interests to put a time limit on your game play.'

 'even if it makes me happy?'

 'yes. because it will eventually make you not happy.'

'like a marriage?'

 'not exactly.'

 'but similar?'

 'sure.'

 'but what else can i fill my day with then?'

 'that's for you to figure out.'

 'but i'm tired of figuring out and thinking and stuff.'

 'do you know who you sound like?'

'someone who's awesome?'

 'no. a 5-year old.'

 'whatever. fine, i'll work on that.'

 'no you won't.'

 'yes i will.'

 'you'll only work on it because i challenged you to work on it.'

 'well, now that you gave that away i won't.'

 'fine. don't. it's your life.'

 Frown.

 Therapist smiles, says; 'oh, looks like that's the end of our session. see you again next week.'

 'i don't like you.'

 'yes, you do. good luck with the video game void.'

 Mumble; 'good luck with the void check.'

 'what was that?'

 'nothing. bye.'