me vs. therapy

Flop on couch.

Lean head back, stare at ceiling.

Watch fan.

Pick one fan blade.

Watch one fan blade circle.

Get headache.

Stop watching one fan blade circle.

Therapist inquires:

‘are you ready to begin?’

Blink at ceiling fan.

Say: ‘recently, I find it hard to collect enough motivation to perform the smallest tasks.’

‘for instance?’

‘making it to the bathroom in time.’

Therapist raises eyebrow, says: ‘angela, I suspect you are beginning to use your deflection technique again.’

‘do you feel sexual tension too?’

‘no, I do not.’

‘oh….yeah, me neither.’

‘would you like to continue explaining about your lack of motivation?’

‘finding the motivation to talk about my lack of motivation is difficult.’

‘well, it’s your party…talk about whatever you’d like then.’

‘can we talk about our sexual tension?’

‘I’m afraid that would only last for 30 seconds.’

‘yeah, then you’d be all over me, huh?’

Another raised eyebrow: ‘tell me about your most recent failed relationship.’

‘….that was deflection.’

‘you are correct.’

Look up…..‘hummmm, my last failed relationship…..well…it kind of failed.’

‘I see…and why do you perceive it failed?’

‘it was the donkey’s fault.’

Therapist makes note, asks: ‘is the donkey a metaphor?’

‘perhaps.’

‘who’s the donkey?’

‘her.’

‘why is it the donkey’s fault.’

‘because the donkey didn’t know how to communicate that it didn’t want me riding it anymore.’

‘how did you discover there would be no more riding then?’

‘the donkey bucked me off.’

‘I see. How did that make you feel?’

‘somewhat sad.’

‘yes, I can understand that a sudden loss would bring sadness.’

‘yeah…and finding replacement donkey’s takes motivation.’

‘which you are short on.’

‘correct.’

‘however, I remember from our last session that you had mentioned you’ve been test driving several donkeys.’

‘yes, I find frequent bursts of motivation hit me, but the lasting effect is lacking.’

Therapist makes note, says: ‘I believe together we can reclaim quite abit of your motivation, for more than just donkey riding.’

‘sounds like sexual tension to me.’ Smile.

Therapist raises eyebrow, says: ‘there is no sexual tension, do you know why there is no sexual tension?’

‘because you’re deflecting?’

‘no, because this donkey already has a rider…..among other reasons.’

‘so you’re saying there’s a chance?’

Therapist sighs, says: ‘moving right along, I think next session wewill explore your past failed relationships further. For now…..work onjust grazing.’

‘no riding?’

‘no…..riding may give you blisters.’

‘that’s a metaphor huh?’

‘perhaps.’